Bake Date: Networking Applesauce Brownies

These mysteriously fruity yummies have scored me so many friends. They are moist and luscious without being overly sweet or overly chocolatey. I've introduced them to several large, differently flavored groups of people and they have never yet failed to evoke groans of belly pleasures and eyes of amazement. They make typically standoffish strangers come a-droolin' at my toes for the recipe. As the old saying goes, "The surest way to great networking is through a person's stomach." These are one of the hottest tools I've got. (WARNING: May be addictive.)

Adapted from this recipe.

What you need:

• 1/3 cup margarine
• 1/2 cup brown sugar
• 1/4 cup white sugar
• 2 eggs
• 1 tsp pure vanilla extract
• 1 cup whole wheat flour
• 1 cup all-purpose flour (Though recently I've been introducing myself to alternatives, such as spelt flour and wheat germ, yeah! Or you could be boring and ditch the whole wheat flour for 2 cups all-purpose. I won't judge.)
• 3 healthy Tbsp unsweetened cocoa powder
• 1/2 tsp salt
• 1 healthy tsp baking soda
• 1 1/2 tsp cinnamon
• dash of nutmeg
• 2 cups applesauce
• 1 cup chopped up chocolate bits (you 'mericans could use chocolate chips, but then you miss out on the tasty workings of the resulting choco-shavings)
• 1 cup chopped walnuts

Oventemp: 350 degrees F (175 degrees C)((450 degrees K))
Makes: Use the big pan, 9x13'' or something along those lines. Halve the recipe for a smaller pan. Duh.
Musik: Anything that puts you in a crowd-pleasing mood, perhaps veering toward bouncy folk.

Paint the pan with margariney hues. (I know it's annoying. Do it anyway.) If your chocolate and walnuts are in need of chopping, chop chop!

Large bowl: Discourage segregation of margarine/butter substitute and sugars with the vigorous mediation of your friendliest wooden spoon. Once happily united, introduce eggs and vanilla.

Large enough bowl: Integrate flour(s), cocoa, salt, baking soda, spices, and cocaine into one big, thoroughly whisked pile of powder.

Add about half of the powder bowl into the slimy bowl and mix until just combined, then daintily fold in half the applesauce, then the rest of the powder, then the rest of the applesauce. (I'm not exactly sure about the chemistry of doing it this way, but that's what the original recipe said to do and it hasn't failed me yet.) Fold in the majority (BUT NOT ALL) of the chocolate chops and walnuts and lay it all down into the pan before you're tempted to overmix. Sprinkle the remaining chocolate and nuts over the top in a spontaneously symmetrical fashion.

Cash in its coupon for a 25-minute trip to the sauna of your oven, though make sure to check it at 20 (or before) as some ovens tend to be more enthusiastic than others. Cool, be cool, stay cool, chill with your new friends and feed them hot brownies. Oh, yeaaaah.